Navigating The Ebb And Flow

I have entitled our message this morning, “Navigating the Ebb and Flow.” The expression “ebb and flow” is an idiom used to describe periods of highs and lows, and growth and decline, just like the rising and falling of the tides. It is essentially the idea that life is not always constant, but rather it has regular periods of ups and downs. Based on this understanding of ebb and flow, I could have also entitled our message, “Managing the Ups and Downs of Life,” or even simply “Dealing with Change.” As a preview to our passage, I will go ahead and tell you that Jesus addresses “change in leadership” and “change in tradition.”

Listen, as I share a portion of what Solomon said at the beginning of Ecclesiastes chapter three: “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die . . . a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance . . . a time to gain, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to throw away” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-2a, 3b-4, 6). Solomon was communicating how life is constantly changing whether we want it to or not. Some change is disheartening, and other change is joyous and cause for celebration.

In our very first verse, which we will re-read in a moment, the disciples of John approached Jesus and asked Him, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast often, but your disciples do not fast?” (Matthew 9:14). This question revealed a much deeper concern than fasting, as it had to do with some difficult life changes felt by both John’s disciples and the Pharisees. The disciples of John were dealing with their leader having been imprisoned; and the Pharisees were horrified over some recent challenges to Law and tradition.(1) But Jesus shared some words to help them understand how to navigate these changes; and it is my hope that His words will help us with the changes that we face.

The Friends of the Bridegroom (vv. 14-15)

14 Then the disciples of John came to Him, saying, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast often, but Your disciples do not fast?” 15 And Jesus said to them, “Can the friends of the bridegroom mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them? But the days will come when the bridegroom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast.”

These verses address a change in leadership. In verse 14, when the disciples of John approached Jesus and asked Him, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast often, but Your disciples do not fast?” this did not mean that Jesus’ disciples “never” fasted; but rather, they fasted less frequently than those of John. They also did not fast for the same reasons. The Pharisees differed in their reasons for sure, as many of their fasts were superstitious. For example, they fasted to obtain the interpretation of a dream, or to avert the evil outcome depicted in a dream. They also fasted frequently to obtain the things they wanted.(2) Unlike the Pharisees, John’s disciples had pure intentions. In contrast to the disciples of Jesus, however, their fasting simply differed in frequency and purpose.

“There is no evidence of a clash between John and Jesus, although it is explicit that John was at least puzzled over the ministry of [Christ]; and for some time, there were those who followed John and not Jesus (Acts 19:1-7). Jesus held John in high esteem, but [He] differed from him.”(3) It is important to note that a difference does not equate to sin. Perhaps God is doing a new work in another church or with another believer than what He is choosing to do with us. “Jesus fasted on occasion and expected that His followers would [do the same], but for Him fasting was governed not by religious customs or calendar but by the needs of the occasion. This He made clear in the analogy of the wedding guests,”(4) which we see in verse 15.

Jesus began by asking, “Can the friends of the bridegroom mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them?” A more literal translation would be “the children of the bride-chamber.”(5) Jesus was probably counting on them to recall how John the Baptist had referred to himself as a friend of the bridegroom (John 3:29). “These persons were the companions of the bridegroom, [his closest friends], who accompanied him to the house of his father-in-law when he went to bring the bride to his own home.”(6) “The couple did not go away for a honeymoon; they stayed at home for [their] honeymoon. For a week after the wedding, open house was kept. The bride and the groom were treated as . . . king and queen. And during that week, their closest friends shared all the joy and all the festivities with them.”(7)