Love Enough To Hate

9.4.22 Luke 14:25–35

25 Large crowds were traveling with Jesus. He turned and said to them, 26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. 27 Whoever does not carry his own cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. 28 For which of you, if he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? 29 Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, everyone who sees it will begin to ridicule him, 30 saying, ‘This fellow began to build, but was not able to finish.’ 31 Or what king, as he goes out to confront another king in war, will not first sit down and consider if he is able with ten thousand to oppose the one who comes against him with twenty thousand? 32 And if he is not able, he sends out a delegation and asks for terms of peace while his opponent is still far away. 33 So then, any one of you who does not say farewell to all his own possessions cannot be my disciple. 34 Salt is good, but if the salt has lost its flavor, how will it become salty again? 35 It is not fit for the soil or for the manure pile. It is thrown away. The one who has ears to hear, let him hear.”

Hard Truth: Love Enough to Hate

“Love is love,” or so they say in America. What does that mean? It means that you can love anyone at any time, or anything at any time. Is that really true? If love is love, what about when a man loves a boy? Now that’s not so bad they say. It’s not sick or perverted or evil. It’s understandable. It’s just a “Minor Attracted Person.” Now, if we truly love our children, we shouldn’t sugar coat such attractions. No, we should even hate it, especially when they try to excuse their desires to give them a reason to molest children and use child pornography. You see, there are sometimes where love brings hate.

Maybe you’ve experienced this type of hatred in your own house with alcohol or drugs. I used to have a classmate that loved alcohol too much. It came to the point that I grew to hate having alcohol anywhere near him because he couldn’t control it and it made a fool of him. Sometimes you have to give an ultimatum. It’s either me or the drugs. That’s it.

I’m trying to set the backdrop for what Jesus preaches about in today’s text when He preaches hate. “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. It’s a seemingly strange thing, because we aren’t talking about child molesters or perverts. We are talking about hating moms and dads and sisters and brothers and children. These are all gifts from God. How could marriage or family exist if there was only hate in the family? Jesus wants us to love our family, He commands us to. So why would He tell us to hate them?

When you put someone or something ahead of someone else, it can sometimes come off as a personal attack. Imagine for instance, that your spouse has not been talking to you much lately. Every time you try to strike up a conversation you get a snide answer or a snippy “yes” or “no.” But then when their old friend calls on the phone, they immediately change their tone and act so nice. The neighbor calls for help and they immediately jump to attention, eager to help. How does that make you feel? It makes you feel almost hated, because they are so happy to hear from other people but they seemingly could care LESS about you!

So when Jesus tells us to hate these family members, He’s talking about putting Him FIRST. He’s talking about wanting a close and personal relationship with Him. It means you’re eager to speak with Him in prayer. You can’t wait to hear what He has to say to you on a Sunday morning. You’re much more excited to spend time with Him than you are with your friends on Saturday night at the bar or Friday night at the football game. He gives you parents and children and friends to love, but keep it in perspective. If they want to get angry at you for taking time with Jesus, well then that’s their problem, not yours.

I can recall hanging out with a group of friends in high school that were leading me down the wrong path. It wasn’t that I hated those friends, they were fun to hang out with. I had to make a choice in life, to start distancing myself from them. I remember how guilty I felt taking the Lord’s Supper when I knew I was going to probably go back to the same sins the next week. I couldn’t keep doing that. I never told them why and never confronted them, but I just slipped away from them and started hanging with a different group. Some of them were mad at me for not hanging out with them anymore. Might that example help a bit?