How To Build A Marriage That Lasts Series

Now please don’t misunderstand what I’m trying to say. I’m not saying that you should nag your spouse and try to change them into someone they’re not. I’m simply saying that you and your spouse should complement one another - that is build on each other’s strengths.

Marriage provides me with a companion who makes my life complete. This is the purpose of marriage!!

And do you know why there are so many miserable marriages? One of the reasons is that most couples don’t realize the purpose of marriage. Some couples view marriage as a buisness partnership, or as a strictly sexual partnership. But the Bible teaches that marriage is much more! It is the joining of two life-long companions who make each other complete!

If you want to build a lasting marriage, then apply this principle into your marriage. Be best friends and build on each other’s strengths!

II. The Priority of Marriage.

(v. 24) When God says, "leave you parents", He is telling us that the husband / wife relationship is more important than the parent / child relationship.

I like the story Dr. Adrian Rogers tells about one his deacons. One of his deacons had a son who verbally abused his mother. When this deacon found out, he sat his son down and said (in effect), "Son, you have sinned against God. But not only that, you have sinned against your mother. But not only that, you have sinned against my wife. And son, NOBODY TALKS TO MY WIFE LIKE THAT!!" I like that! That Deacon recognized the priority of marriage.

If we were to arrange our relationships according to priority, it would go like this: Jesus is 1st, your spouse is 2nd, and your children are 3rd.

This doesn’t mean that God wants you to disown your parents when you get married. The fact of the matter is, God wants you to honor them all the way to the grave. God doesn’t want you to disown your parents, but he does want you to break the parent / child bond that you’ve had with them. He wants you to sever the cords that once provided security, protection, financial assistance, and physical needs. And refusing to break that bond will hinder the marriage and it could cause it to collapse (ILL: our former neighbor who got a divorce because she had a mother-n-law who wouldn’t let go and a husband who wouldn’t turn loose).

So parents, you need to LET GO. Our job as parents is to raise our children to a point where they no longer need us. Our objective is to work ourselves out of job (not out of a relationship). And when the day comes when they get married, make sure you let them go. And I’m told that if you do your job well, you won’t be loosing a son or a daughter when they get married - you’ll be gaining a friend.

I heard a story about a mother and father who gave their precious daughter away in marriage. After the honeymoon, their daughter and her husband moved several states away. A few weeks later, the phone rang, the mother answered, and it was their daughter. She was in tears because she and her husband had just had their first fight. The daughter asked to speak to her dad. He took the phone and went into another room and talked to "his little girl" for about 10 minutes. When he came back out, the mother asked, "What did she say." The father replied, "She and her husband had a big fight and she wants to come home." After a moment of silence, the mother asked, "What did you say?" The father answered, "I told her, SHE IS HOME." That’s good! That father recognized that he needed to let go after his daughter said "I do."