Grieving With Hope

Memorial Service

1 Thess 4:13

"But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope".

Of all the church services we encounter, one of the most difficult is funerals. The family and congregation are drawn together by a joint event; common purpose; collective grief. The person they have come to honour; to say goodbye to is not there.

At a wedding you have a happy couple; at a baby dedication, happy parents and doting grandparents; at a preaching service, a congregation that has come voluntarily to worship and be strengthened by the Word.

At a wedding, everyone waits with bated breath for you to say, 'You may now kiss the bride'. At a baby dedication, you challenge the parents to nurture the child in the ways of the Lord. At church, you preach, hoping that those who are awake are listening to you. You say 'amen' and pray that the Holy Spirit will be the after-preacher. With each event and service, there is a 'happily ever after'; a 'from this day forward'; a future that has a goal, a purpose, a prize for which to reach.

A funeral or memorial service is different: it is a service of finality. The person whom we come to say goodbye to will not be spending tomorrow with us reflecting on what happened today – they are not part of what happens on the earth from this day forward.

This evening we have come to pay tribute to the memory of our loved one. We have come to remember the path along which he walked.

But above all, we have come to remember that, as we face the reality of separation; the reality of loss; the reality of death, we do so within the context of hope.

Why do I talk about "hope" in the face of death? It is because, on reflecting on death, Paul states in 1 Thess 4:13

"But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope".

As we face the reality of death; the reality of separation from a loved one, the question is: How do we sorrow?

Do we sorrow with hope; or do we sorrow as those who have no hope? The very phrase used by Paul seems to create a problem: "sorrow" and "hope" don't seem to go together.

Why does Paul speak about sorrowing with hope? What is the basis for this "hope" referred to by Paul? What is it that gives us hope amid sorrow? When the Bible speaks about "hope", what is this hope of the Christian?

It is not merely an expectation or a nostalgic dream for the future.

Christian hope is coherent. It is logical. It is based on concrete evidence, grounded in the Word of God - and we know that God cannot lie.

Job was able to say: I know that my Redeemer lives. Job 19:25

Paul could say in 1 Tim 1:12: For I know whom I have believed . . ."

The Christian has a hope that is "the assurance … the conviction of things not seen" (Heb 11:1). It is a hope that is like faith…a faith that cannot be moved by circumstances or what the eyes see because an unseen God is seen in His faithfulness. (Sol Motsepe in his book, Faith, Hope and Love, p 81).

Paul puts it this way in I Corinthians 13:13; "And now abide faith, hope, love, these three;"

For the believer in Christ, hope is not a fanciful wish – something that is like the mist which disappears before the morning sun; that floats off into the wind, never to be seen again.

Hope, for the Christian, is based on concrete evidence. And that is why Paul can say: "We do not mourn as those who have no hope."

• It is hope based on the Biblical, Christian belief system that gives meaning to life;

• It is hope grounded in scripture that describes the destiny of those who have placed their confidence, their hope, in the infallible word of God.

• It is hope based on the promise of the second coming of Christ underwritten by the death of Christ on the Cross and guaranteed through the resurrection of Jesus from the tomb.

• John describes this hope - the blessed hope - in Revelation 21:1-4

1. "Now I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away. Also, there was no more sea.

2. Then I, John, saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.