Family Secrets

Family Secrets

Deut. 6:4-9

Introduction:

HOW TO KNOW WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE READY TO HAVE KIDS:

MESS TEST

Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

TOY TEST

Obtain a 55 gallon box of Legos (or you may substitute roofing tacks). Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream because this would wake a child at night.

GROCERY STORE TEST

Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop. Always keep them in sight & pay for anything they eat or damage.

DRESSING TEST

Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all the arms stay inside.

FEEDING TEST

Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

NIGHT TEST

Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag & fill it with 8-12 pounds of sand. Soak it in water. At 3:00pm begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00p.m. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00pm.Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00a.m. Set alarm for 5:00. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

AUTOMOBILE TEST

Forget the BMW and buy a station wagon. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there. Get a dime. Stick it into the cassette player. Take a family size package of chocolate chip cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

PHYSICAL TEST (Women)

Obtain a large bean bag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans. And try not to notice your closet full of clothes. You won’t be wearing them for a while.

PHYSICAL TEST (Men)

Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a

newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

FINAL ASSIGNMENT

Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training and child’s table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run wild. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.

There are so many dysfunctional families today.

A dysfunctional family is dysfunctional because of unmet needs.

Whether it¡¦s:

„h a physical need,

„h an emotional need,

„h an intellectual need or

„h a spiritual need, dysfunctional families are dysfunctional because somebody, sometime, somewhere failed to meet a need.

That¡¦s why you find throughout the Bible dysfunctional families.

„h Isaac had a dysfunctional family!

„h Jacob had a dysfunctional family!

„h David had a dysfunctional family!

„h And then there was Judge Eli!

Now Eli¡¦s family perhaps was similar to many families today.

Eli was a faithful man.

He had a duel responsibility at the church as both priest and judge.

Eli was also a family man.

He had two sons who grew up to be priest like their daddy.

But there was something wrong in his home.

Eli was a success professionally but a failure domestically.

Eli reminds me of Billy Sunday, the great evangelist. As he was out winning the world he neglected his children. In fact, all of his children turned from the faith and several became alcoholics. And at the end of his ministry, Billy Sunday said, I have won the entire world to Christ, but have lost my family.

It¡¦s apparent that Eli made some tragic mistakes with his family.

If we make the same mistakes, our homes can be ruined too.

Read text.

Everybody wants to know what the secret is to having a good home.

It¡¦s really no secret because God has revealed His plan in His book.

I¡¦ll give you some things that I believe is important to building a solid foundation for a home.

A good home must have:

I. LOVE

Several years ago, a murky alligator and snake filled bayou near Mobile, Alabama became the temporary grave of 47 people. At 70 miles per hour, an Amtrak train plunged its four leading cars into that bayou on a foggy, dark, Alabama morning just before 3:00 a.m. Moments before this accident, a towboat had errantly entered the bayou, striking the bridge and weakening it. It was so remote an area that it took two hours for helicopter assistance to arrive. Emergency vehicles could only get within six miles of the accident. One of the known heroes on this early morning was a man named, Michael Dopheide. He saved the lives of 30 passengers that morning. He had just received his tax law degree from DePaul University and he was heading to Florida to visit his sister. He treaded water in that 25 foot deep bayou, coaxing people to jump six feet to him, grabbing their arms when they would surface the water. The people he saved included, a two year old, an elderly lady and an eleven year old girl with cerebral palsy. Andrea, this cerebral palsy victim was traveling with her mom and dad, Geray and Mary Jane Chancey. When water filled their train car on that eerie morning, the Chanceys pushed their daughter into the hands of her rescuers. This act of love was Geray and Mary Jane Chancey’s last act on this earth. Moments later, they drowned. Their act of love may be the greatest act of love I have ever read in my life, besides what Jesus did for us.