Eulogy

“There is a leak in this old building”

Memories

? Easter Sunday, Kimberly was 4 or 5 years old: “What are you looking at me for? I didn’t come here to stay. I came to wish you a happy Easter day!”

? My baby sister had a talent that would have made her the envy of jury consultants and police detectives everywhere. (explain, including her noticing when I didn’t like something)

? I hope I say this correctly: Kimberly showed absolutely no hesitation in freely sharing her thoughts about things. Can I get a witness? So, if you were on the other end of her thoughts you had one of two choices, and I don’t really think this is too much of an exaggeration: agree and move on or go to a neutral corner and wait for Michael Buffer to say “Let’s get ready to rumble!”

? After our Mom died Carla and Kim formed, what I affectionately call C & K Fashion Consultants. They only had one client: our Dad, whom they lovingly called, John Blu – that’s B-L-U. Kim and Carla were so good at coordinating Daddy’s outfits that he often looked like he had just walked right out of GQ Magazine. Can I get a witness? (My “tie” story – Kim: “I don’t work like that. I buy things to match!”)

? One more Kimberly story. She loved it when I came home to visit during the last couple of years of Daddy’s life. I would barely be in the door and she’d give me the look. It was the “you are making coffee in the morning” look. Daddy liked “see through” coffee. Kim hated it. My coffee was so strong that if you didn’t put generous amounts of cream and sugar or honey in it, you couldn’t drink it. Kim and I – we liked coffee that “moved” us.

Kim, when I came home this time, I made the coffee just the way you and I like it. And with each sip, sweetie, when I closed my eyes I saw you smiling as you sipped your cup.

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Before preparing my remarks, I looked up the word “eulogy.” A eulogy is “a speech that praises someone who dies.”

Today, I really don’t need to do that for Kimberly. All I have to do is look at each of you. Your very presence here today is giving her eulogy – high praise – which no words can adequately express.

The late tennis star Arthur Ash, in his autobiography Days of Grace, wrote "If one's reputation is a possession, then of all my possessions, my reputation means most to me. Nothing comes even close to it in importance."

Putt, Soupie and Connie, would you please stand? Now look around and see all of the faces here today. You are looking at the faces of people who are here because of your Mom’s reputation – because of the kind of life that she lived. Trust me when I say this, there are no words to express how much they cared about your Mom. So they came here today to show you and Darryll how much they cared about your Mom.

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Today, I’m going to echo the words of my brother Delrick. I asked him to read the Scripture at our daughter’s memorial service nearly four years ago, almost to the day. The first thing he said was “I don’t want to be here.” Family, I don’t want to be here.

But that’s where we find ourselves today – a place where we don’t want to be and doing a thing we were not prepared to do.

We find ourselves looking at Kimberly’s body and saying “Kim, we love you and we miss you so much already” when what we really want to say is “Kim, get up. It’s not time for you to go.”

We find ourselves looking around at our family and trying to understand why Kimberly is not among the faces we see.

We find ourselves thinking about the last time we spoke to Kimberly on the phone or in person.

We find ourselves thinking “If I had just known that visit or that telephone call would be the last one I’d have with her, I would have (fill in the blank).”

And for those of you having these thoughts – that’s all right. That’s all right. You will have these questions and feelings tomorrow, next week, next month and in the months to come.

But don’t beat yourself up with the “What ifs?” because there will never be a satisfactory answer to the question.

You have to make up your mind to believe God’s promise: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Death is a foreign concept to us because we are spirit beings who will live forever. We will live forever in heaven or we will burn forever in hell.