Don't Be A Sore Loser

Remember the Nike advertisement that ran during the 1996 Olympics which said, “You don’t win silver, you lose gold.” Remember last summer when the Texas Longhorns were beaten by California State at Fullerton in the College World Series of Baseball. The Texas team decided not to attend the ceremonies at which they were to be presented the runner-up trophy. Sore losers if there ever were any.

The year after my coaching debut, I was appointed to a church that sat on about nine and a half acres of land, several acres of which were nothing but weeds. After being there for a couple of years, I decided that we needed a softball diamond. When I went to the Administrative Council with the idea, they informed me that we didn’t have the money. Several people in particular were adamant that we didn’t need a softball diamond at all, and weren’t shy about letting me know that.

When I have a setback like that, I have a tendency to back off a little, rework the idea, and come back from a new angle. So I did some more research and came back to the Administrative Council and told them that I had found a construction company that would let us borrow a bulldozer for a weekend in order to level out the field. I found a farmer who was replacing a fence on his property and would let us have the old fence for free if we just went and picked it up. I enlisted a cadre of men in the church who were willing to spend the time to get this diamond in shape. I asked the Ad. Council if they would give us the go-ahead to put in a ball diamond since it wouldn’t cost the church a dime. They agreed.

I thought that this was a win-win situation. I would get my ball field and the folks who were worried about finances didn’t have to worry about paying for it. My failure of leadership came with my inability to move people out of a win-lose mindset and into the win-win. There were a group of folks who remained adamant about their position and were determined not to be good losers.

The story of Jacob gives us a picture of a man who certainly learned how to be a good loser. When you think about it, this is somewhat surprising from Jacob because, up to this point in his life, he didn’t like to lose at anything.

If you remember his story, you will recall that he was a twin. His brother Esau was actually born first, but when Jacob emerged from his mother’s womb, he had hold of Esau’s heal, a sign that he would challenge for the rights of the first-born. In fact, when they were young men, Esau came in from a day of hunting so hungry that he sold his birth-right as first-born for a bowl of stew that Jacob had been preparing. Later on, when their father was an old man, Jacob tricked him into giving him the blessing that was due to the oldest son.

The brothers hated each other and went their separate ways. Years later, after Jacob had matured, he wanted to make peace with Esau, although he wasn’t sure if Esau would accept him. Jacob was on his way to meet Esau one night when, as he found himself alone, “a man wrestled with him until daybreak.” When the fight was over, Jacob realized that he had really gone 15 rounds with God.