Can I Have Doubts And Still Be A Christian? Series

Henri Nouwen wrote, “So I am praying while not knowing how to pray. I am resting while feeling restless, at peace while tempted, safe while still anxious, surrounded by a cloud of light while still in darkness, in love while still doubting.” As long as we are in this world we will always live in the tension between faith and despair, but it is our love for God which allows us to outlive our doubts.

Frederick Buechner said, “If you tell me Christian commitment is a kind of thing that has happened to you once and for all like some kind of spiritual plastic surgery, I say. . . you’re either pulling the wool over your own eyes or trying to pull it over mine. Every morning you should wake up in your bed and ask yourself: ‘Can I believe it all again today?’ No, better still, don’t ask it till after you’ve read The New Your Times, till after you’ve studied that daily record of the world’s brokenness and corruption, which should always stand side by side with your Bible. Then ask yourself if you can believe in the Gospel of Jesus Christ again for that particular day.” Faith is a daily, ongoing exercise. It is a risk. Doubts arise. We struggle with God. And hopefully, faith grounded in the goodness of God triumphs — even when we do not have all the answers and life doesn’t make sense.

The third thing we need to understand is that: A cynical spirit leads us away from God. The best Christians in the world have had serious doubts. Abraham didn’t know if he could trust God (Genesis 15:8). Gideon did not know whether God would live up to his promise (Judges 6:17). John the Baptist questioned whether Jesus was the Messiah after all (Matthew 11:3). Some of the disciples doubted whether God really did raise Jesus from the dead (Matthew 28:17). Thomas doubted and demanded that he be able to touch Christ’s wounds before he would believe (John 20:25). But, ultimately, in spite of their doubts, all of them put their trust in God.

However, there is one kind of doubt that is deadly. It is cynicism. Cynicism questions but never attempts to resolve the questions. Cynicism questions merely to question. It is not a true quest, it questions to mock and jest. There is always a smirk on its lips. The cynic is pleased with doubt; looks for ways to doubt; delights in things which can be questioned. The cynic holds up experiences of being hurt by Christians, and uses them as an excuse to abandon the faith. They point to the failure of believers. They look for inconsistencies and find contradictions. They expect God to jump out of the sky and meet their demands and answer all their questions. (By the way, he tried that and there were many who still did not believe.) In the gospel of John we read: “Even after Jesus had done all these miraculous signs in their presence, they still would not believe in him” (John 12:37). Cynicism is dishonest doubt.

The Bible calls this hardheartedness. The Greek word is sklerokardia (Mark 16:14). (Sklero is used in arteriosklerosis, meaning “hardening of the arteries.” Kardia is used in “cardiac,” as in cardiac arrest, meaning the heart has stopped.) This condition of the hardening of the heart can be fatal. There is a cure for doubt, but cynicism is a condition of the heart which prevents genuine faith. It can always raise more objections than it is possible to answer. Cynicism resists surrendering to God. This is the problem. The Bible warns: “See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly till the end the confidence we had at first. As has just been said: ‘Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion’” (Hebrews 3:12-15).