Back To School

INTRO.- Children are wonderful. How dull life would be without them! And remember we were once children too!

ILL.- Teacher to student, “What are you – animal, vegetable or mineral?” The boy replied, “Vegetable. I’M A HUMAN BEAN.”

ILL.- It was the little girl’s first day at school and the teacher was making out her registration card. “What is your father’s name?” She said, “Daddy.”

“Yes, I know he’s your daddy, but what does your mother call him?” “Oh, she don’t call him anything. SHE LIKES HIM.”

ILL.- The teacher said, “Why don’t you brush your teeth? I can see what you had for breakfast this morning.”

Boy, “What did I have?” Teacher, “Eggs.” Boy, “You’re wrong! THAT WAS YESTERDAY!”

ILL.- A girl student to a boy student, “Too bad you flunked the test. How far were you from the right answers?” Boy, “TWO SEATS.”

ILL.- A father was examining his son’s report card. He said, “One thing is definitely in your favor. WITH THIS REPORT CARD YOU COULDN’T POSSIBLY BE CHEATING.”

ILL.- A librarian said, “Please, be quiet. The people next to you can’t read.” The little boy said, “What a shame! I’ve been reading since I was six.”

ILL.- Johnny’s first day of school the class was to put their right hands over their hearts and repeat the Pledge of Allegiance.

The teacher watched the children as he started the pledge, "I pledge allegiance to the flag..."

She stopped when she noticed Johnny’s right hand over the left side of his rear end. "Johnny, I will not continue until you put your hand over your heart,” the teacher said.

Johnny replied, "Ma’am, it is over my heart." After several attempts to get Johnny to put his hand over his heart, the teacher asked, "Why do you think that is your heart?"

"Because whenever my Granny visits, she picks me up, pats me here, and says, ’Bless your little heart,’ and my Granny doesn’t lie!"

ILL.- Little Mary, just home from her first day at school, was asked by her mother, “Honey, what did you learn today?” “Not much,” replied Mary, “I’ve got to go back tomorrow.”

Back to school. Back to life. Back to reality. These words don’t sound the best, but reality is something that we all have to face whether it’s school, work, people or whatever.

PROP.- I want to share some thoughts that will help you in school and in all of life. In fact, these words apply to both young and old.

1- Pay attention to all in authority

2- Don’t give in to peer pressure

3- Make Christ the Lord of your life

I. PAY ATTENTION TO ALL IN AUTHOIRTY

Prov. 1:8-9 CEV “My child, obey the teachings of your parents, and wear their teachings as you would a lovely had or a pretty necklace.” Pay attention to your parents, your teachers, and all people in authority.

ILL.- A boy said to his father, “Dad, the principal said for me to invite you to a small meeting at the school.” “How small is the meeting, son?” asked the father. The boy replied, “IT’S YOU AND ME AND THE PRINCIPAL.”

Young people, if you don’t pay attention in school you could be asked to attend a meeting like that one! I’ve been to one of those before and I didn’t like it!

ILL.- My dad, who was a truck driver, used to say to me when I was a boy, “Pay attention to what you’re doing.” I guess he figured I had a problem with paying attention.

It’s always pays to pay attention in life. Not paying attention can get anyone into trouble regardless of what they’re doing.

ILL.- Let me tell you what happened to me one time because I didn’t pay attention. I don’t know how old I was, but my older brother and I were riding our bikes around town. We went down one street which was really great. It was all downhill and we could coast really fast. The problem was; I wasn’t looking in front of me. I was looking at my brother who was beside me and I was probably trying to talk to him.

Suddenly, I hit the back bumper of an old Ford, which was parked. BAM! My bike stayed where it was and I went flying over that Ford. I flew over the entire length of that Ford! I landed on my back with my head just in front of that car.

I don’t know what hit the pavement first; my head or my behind, but it knocked me out. When I woke up my brother was standing over me. He probably thought he had a dead brother on his hands. AND IT COULD HAVE HAPPENED! And all because I was not paying attention to my bike riding. And this is often why people have car wrecks. They are not paying attention to their driving. They are talking on their cell phones, combing their hair, putting on makeup, drinking something, etc.