What Should A Good Church Family Look Like? Series

The Spirit of a Church: Churches have a spirit about them, whether good or bad.

- By “spirit” here, I don’t mean that churches have a soul or anything like that. No, I simply mean that churches have a mood, a personality, a spirit about them.

- We’ve all experienced what I’m talking about. Have you ever walked into a church and before you even got halfway through the service you knew this was a cold, judgmental, unfriendly place? No one had to tell you that – you discerned it because you can’t hide the spirit that a church has.

- In contrast, we’ve all been in a church for the first time and before you got halfway through the service it was almost as though you sensed the love and warmth in the air. Again, no one had to tell you that – you discerned it because you can’t hide the spirit that a church has.

- You can have resentment rise in a church when it seems like others aren’t stepping up to do their part so a few get overworked. You can have resentment in a church when people are sitting on their hands because they don’t want to do their part. You can have resentment when people are heading for the exits because of contention in the church and those left feel overwhelmed. Some of you have gone to church when it felt like a burden rather than a joy.

- This raises an obvious question: what does a good spirit in a church look like? If we want more of that in our church (because I do think we have a good spirit), what do we need more of?

- This passage is an interesting commentary from Paul on how they uplifted Titus when he was with them. It’s a portrait of what a good church family looks like. So let’s pull out a few of the key phrases and see if we can get a clearer picture.

- One thing I want to say up front: the things that the Corinthian church was doing weren’t extraordinary. What we’re about to go over don’t require some special knowledge or ability.

- Much of the church being what it should be is not complicated or complex, but getting the simple things right.

What Should a Good Church Family Look Like?

1. Encouraging.

- 2 Corinthians 7:13 – “encouraged,” “encouragement.”

- Notice how encouraging seems to have an expansive effect. Paul and his companions are encouraged by the Corinthians’ actions (v. 13), but they were also encouraged by how the Corinthians treated Titus (v. 13). When you have people lifting each other up, it creates an environment where it’s easy for more and more encouragement to happen.

- Let me share an example of being encouraged that has happened to me lately. As you know, my son Jonathan is now a youth pastor. As that church has been positive with him, it has been encouraging to me. When they approached him about licensing him for ministry, that was encouraging to me. When the pastor purchased a suit for Jonathan so that he’d have one to lead communion in, that was encouraging to me. When they gave him a chance to preach regularly, that was encouraging to me. When they spoke to us when we visited there about how thankful they were to have Jonathan there, that was encouraging to me. Now, mind you, none of that was directed at me, but nonetheless it was encouraging to me.

- Let me be clear: by encouraging, I don’t just mean “be nice to each other.” A shallow politeness isn’t enough. Encouraging each other requires that we actually speak positive words to each other. It requires that we actually invest in each other’s lives. It requires that we want to have an impact on those around us.

- It’s amazing how an encouraging environment fosters more encouragement. It’s also striking how quickly that can disappear when things start going awry.

2. Refreshing.

- 2 Corinthians 7:13 – “refreshed.”

- Verse 13 speaks of how Titus was “refreshed” by the Corinthians and how they treated him.

- We’ve all been around toxic people and when we’re done with them, you feel like you want to go take a shower to wash the negative off. Those conversations and interactions leave you drained emotionally because of the negativity.

- In contrast, when you’re around people who have this refreshment about them, you leave uplifted and energized. Their words and actions toward you are like a stream flowing into your spirit.

- I have sat in a meeting doing no physical work and yet left drained. I have worked hard physically and yet finished energized. The people we are surrounded by can have that effect.