Contributed by Mark Hensley on May 11, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 53,916 views
A teacher asked a boy this question: “Suppose your mother baked a pie and there were seven of you—your parents and five children. What part of the pie would you get?” “A sixth,” replied the boy. “I’m afraid you don’t know your fractions,” said the teacher. “Remember, there are seven of you.”
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on May 2, 2003
based on 4 ratings
| 1,675 views
MY LABELING SYSTEM
I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals.
Forget calling them "Veal Parmigiana" or "Turkey Loaf" or "Beef Pot Pie."
If you look in my freezer you’ll see "Whatever," "Anything," "I Don’t Know," and, my favorite, "Food."
That way when I ask my husband what he
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Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Jan 14, 2004
based on 2 ratings
| 2,774 views
A new homeowner’s riding lawn mower had broken down, and he had been working fruitlessly for two hours trying to get it back together.
Suddenly, one of his neighbors appeared with a handful of tools.
“Can I give some help?” he asked.
In twenty minutes he had the mower functioning
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Ian Johnson on May 11, 2005
In 1952 Florence Chadwick attempted to swim from Catalina Island to mainland California, prior to this she had swum the English channel twice. During the swim she became very tired and her mother urged her on, but she just couldn’t do it.When she got into the boat she saw for herself that she was
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Pat Cook on May 16, 2005
based on 11 ratings
| 1,229 views
These two Grand Mananers took a ferry off the island and went deep into the woods on the mainland, searching for a Christmas tree.
After hours of subzero temperatures and a few close calls with hungry wolves, one Grand Mananer turned to the other and said, "I’m chopping down the next tree I
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Gene Gregory on Jul 23, 2005
based on 2 ratings
| 3,240 views
Some people do not have birth certificates. One such person was Will Rogers. Once, Will Rogers was applying for a passport and the clerk asked him for his birth certificate. He said that he didn’t have one. She said that she needed one in order to issue a passport. He asked why. She replied,
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 8, 2005
based on 9 ratings
| 3,288 views
A priest was taking a tour of biblical sites, when he came to a beach and saw a boat and a sign advertising,
"TAKE A BOAT RIDE TO THE EXACT PLACE WHERE JESUS WALKED ON WATER!!!"
Inquiring about it, he learned that the ride there was free, so he went.
After viewing it, he said to the captain
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 8, 2005
based on 14 ratings
| 3,250 views
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 15, 2005
While eating in a restaurant, I reprimanded my four-year-old son for speaking with his mouth full. “Mump umn Kmpfhm,” was all I heard.
“Drew,” I scolded, “no one can understand a word you’re saying.”
“He says he wants some ketchup,” my husband said calmly.
A woman sitting nearby leaned over and
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I found a book called “Love Hunger” and I started reading it.They talked about how an empty heart will cause some people to over eat to fill it but the reality is they are overfilling the stomach – not dealing with the heart issue. I continued to read from this book and listen to some of the
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Owen Bourgaize on Nov 9, 2000
based on 154 ratings
| 4,268 views
A vicar had a dream. He was on his way to heaven. Before him there stretched a long flight of stairs. As he started to go up, he was given a piece of chalk and told that he must put a chalk mark on each of the steps for each sin he had committed. When he was about halfway up he met the bishop
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Dan Erickson on Nov 21, 2000
based on 160 ratings
| 3,594 views
There is a story about a pastor who was building a wooden trellis to support a climbing vine. As he pounded away, he saw that a little boy was watching him. The youngster didn’t say a word, so the pastor kept on working, thinking the lad would just leave. But he didn’t. Finally the pastor asked,
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Curtis Kittrell on Sep 23, 2001
based on 111 ratings
| 1,713 views
Our 7-year-old daughter had just won $2.00 for her memory work in Sunday school. After the morning service, the pastor’s wife congratulated her.
Our daughter proudly announced, "And I put it all in the morning’s offering!"
"My, how wonderful!" the pastor’s wife exclaimed. "I’m sure God will be
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 9, 2001
based on 209 ratings
| 2,600 views
Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman to stone her and approached them. "What’s going on
here, anyway?" he asked. "This woman was found committing adultery and the law says we
should stone her!" one of the crowd responded. "Wait," yelled Jesus, "Let he who is without
sin cast the first stone."
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Contributed by Byron Sherman on Dec 14, 2001
based on 1 rating
| 3,726 views
A large company offers to fly Bob out to a meeting business class.
During the return flight they were given gourmet brownies and cookies. Not hungry, Bob decides to save them for later, so he places them in an air sickness bag.
After the plane landed bob gets up to leave and a stewardess
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 2,901 views
During the course of his sermon, a preacher wanted to emphasize the brevity of life. He took a long pause, then said, “Every member of this church is going to die.” But, to his surprise, a man in the back row responded to this statement with a big smile.
Repeat twice, louder…After the sermon he
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Sermon Central