Contributed by Howard Parnell on Sep 26, 2002
based on 136 ratings
| 2,758 views
The story is told of a little girl whose parents never went to church. However, they insisted upon her
attendance and what is more is that she had to be able to recite the preacher’s text for the day. One morning she rushed home excited: "Oh mama, my name is in the Bible." "That’s not likely,"
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 2,701 views
Matthew was playing in the yard. His grandmother came to the door to check on him and heard him say, "Hell." She was shocked and scolded him, Matthew, we do not use that word. Who did you hear say that?" His reply was, "Rick" (His preacher’s name) "When did he say that?",
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
based on 2 ratings
| 6,671 views
PUNCTUATING ADVENT
You may have chuckled when I started this sermon by talking about the importance of punctuation. But prudent punctuation is no joke. In Russia, a period actually saved a man's life. The Czar had condemned the man to death and sent this telegram to the jailer: PARDON IMPOSSIBLE.
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Contributed by Bruce Howell on Mar 23, 2004
based on 33 ratings
| 15,162 views
IT WAS PENTECOST SUNDAY. As the congregation filed into church, the ushers handed each person a bright red carnation to symbolize the festive spirit of the day. The people listened attentively to the reading of the Pentecost story from the Book of Acts about how the disciples had heard “what
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Wesleyan
Contributed by Tim Adams on Dec 1, 2009
A parable is told of a community of ducks waddling off to duck church one Sunday to hear their duck preacher. After they waddled into the duck sanctuary, the service began and the duck preacher spoke eloquently of how God had given the ducks wings with which to fly. He pounded the pulpit with his
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Baptist
Contributed by Gordon Curley on Mar 27, 2011
BAPTIZE THE WALLET, TOO
A man who was about to be baptized by immersion was on his way into the pool when he realized that in his back pocket was his wallet. He stopped and was about to remove it when the preacher said, "Stop! Either I baptize you wallet and all or not at all!"
Now the preacher
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Brethren
A television executive called the pastor of a metropolitan church in another city, and told the pastor: "I think that my son is in your city, involved in the drug culture." He then asked the preacher if he would try to find the boy and do something with him. About four months later the boy was
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Jimmy Haile on Sep 29, 2011
based on 4 ratings
| 3,047 views
WHOSE BOY ARE YOU?
"I was about 12 years old when a new preacher came to my church. I would always go in late and slip out early. But one day the preacher said the benediction so fast I got caught and had to walk out with the crowd. I could feel every eye in church on me.
"Just about the time I
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 28, 2009
based on 1 rating
| 3,330 views
One summer while I was in church camp I had a preacher friend ask me, "Do you work 40 hours a week? There are many preachers out there who don’t."
And what if a preacher or anyone else, for that matter, were hired to work 40 hours a week and they didn’t work 40 hours a week? That would be
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Contributed by Ted Sutherland on Apr 3, 2001
based on 159 ratings
| 3,221 views
From Reader’s Digest:
It’s time to pay my income tax
And, brother, that’s no joke.
For after paying IRS
I find that I R broke!
—Jerry Henderson in Lubbock, Texas, Avalanche-Journal
As April 15 draweth nigh,
My spirits start to droop.
A poor, downtrodden slave am I,
In short, an income
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Baptist
This week my brother-in-law, Bob, and his family stopped by to see us on their way to South Padre. They were full of enthusiasm as they looked forward to getting away from the grind. Four days later they stopped by again on their way back to San Angelo. The funny thing is, they looked worn out.
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Sep 4, 2008
I always tell couples that I marry about the 50/50 principle of marriage. True or false. Marriage is a 50/50 proposition. Each partner brings their half to make a whole. It’s false of course. It is 100/100. In relationships, two halves don’t make a whole. We joke about our better half. But in
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Church Of God
Contributed by Bill Prater on Jan 21, 2001
based on 117 ratings
| 2,735 views
The late president Calvin Coolidge returned home from church one Sunday afternoon and found his wife sitting in the chair. Unable to go that day, she was still interested in what the preacher had to say. She asked her husband what the preacher spoke about and he said, "Sin."
Like most women, a
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Baptist
Contributed by Dan Erickson on Nov 20, 2000
based on 206 ratings
| 9,227 views
Henry Ward Beecher was one of the great preachers of the 19th Century. He was ill one Sunday, so a substitute pastor walked up to the pulpit as the worship service began. Seeing that Dr. Beecher would not be speaking that day, a number of people got up and headed for the door. The substitute
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Royce Hendry on Mar 29, 2001
based on 189 ratings
| 3,426 views
one lady wrote in to a question and answer forum. "Dear Sirs, Our preacher said on Easter, that Jesus just swooned on the cross and that the disciples nursed Him back to health. What do you think? Sincerely, Bewildered.
Dear Bewildered, Beat your preacher with a cat-of-nine-tails with 39 heavy
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 22, 2003
based on 5 ratings
| 5,283 views
TOP 10 THINGS TO DO INSIDE A WHALE
10) “Can you hear me now?”
9) Pray … he’s bulemic
8) Bonfire and fish fry!
7) Open a sushi bar
6) "Consider it pure joy"
5) Floss … the whale
4) Finally get motivated to read Moby Dick
3) Listen to tapes of your preacher’s old
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Sermon Central