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In Sermon Illustrations: "New Patch On Old Garment"

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  • Ugly Isn’t For Sissies

    Contributed by James Snyder on Feb 4, 2023
     | 1,289 views

    Over the years of marital bliss, we’ve not had many disagreements. She likes broccoli. I like Apple Fritters. We’ve never been able to come to any agreement with that. But, outside of that, everything has been rather smooth. There’s one controversy that has plagued our house for the last few ...read more

  • The ...

    Contributed by Eric Ferguson on May 8, 2008
     | 2,072 views

    The List Once upon a time a woman was married to a perfectionist husband. No matter what his wife did for him, it was never enough. At the beginning of each day, he would make out his list of chores for her to do, and at the end of each day, he would scrutinize it to make sure she had done all ...read more

  • The Comparison Game

    Contributed by Andrew Chan on May 9, 2002
     | 4,089 views

    The Comparison Game There was a new mom who told this story: “I shouldn’t have been upset, but I must admit I was. My doctor released me from the hospital only two days after my baby was born because my mother would be here to help me. I had been home only about an hour when the doorbell rang. ...read more

  • Watch Out For ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 11, 2008
     | 2,485 views

    WATCH OUT FOR FAKERS Sometimes the titles of news stories are so captivating that I just have to read them. One that caught my attention this week said: “‘World’s Greatest Dad’ Arrested As Predator.” It roused your curiosity too, didn’t it? Here’s the story from Lansing, Michigan: "Attorney ...read more

  • The Tomb Is Empty

    Contributed by Donnie Martin on Apr 14, 2010
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,688 views

    THE TOMB IS EMPTY Little Philip, born with Down Syndrome, attended a third-grade Sunday School class with several eight-year-old boys and girls. Typical of that age, the children did not readily accept Philip with his differences, according to an article in Leadership Magazine. But because of a ...read more

  • A Funny Thanksgiving Joke To Share!

    Contributed by Dr. Larry Petton on Nov 18, 2021
     | 15,103 views

    A FUNNY THANKSGIVING JOKE TO SHARE! A retiree in Florida phones his daughter in New Jersey and says, “Honey, I have bad news for you. Your mother and I have decided that 52 years of marriage is enough. We’re calling it quits and getting a divorce.” His daughter yells, “Are you crazy? What the ...read more

  • I Looked About Some More And Saw A Huge Maple ...

    Contributed by Lisa Delay on Aug 10, 2005
     | 3,580 views

    I looked about some more and saw a huge maple tree. Magnificent, tall and strong it had many leaves like a flowing royal garment. It was lush and full of gorgeous green foliage so not a branch could be seen. It was in all its glory. -Lisa DeLay, wrier and founder of wit4life.com As I continued my ...read more

  • A Pastor And His Wife Decide To Have The Church ...  PRO

    Contributed by Richard Jones on Nov 3, 2000
    based on 127 ratings
     | 7,976 views

    A pastor and his wife decide to have the church deacons and their wives over for dinner. It was quite an undertaking, but the pastor and his wife want to be "Salt and Light" for the leaders of their church. When it comes time for dinner, everyone is seated and the pastor's wife asks her little four ...read more

  • Dr. George Sweeting Once Estimated That "More ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 2, 2002
    based on 23 ratings
     | 4,180 views

    Dr. George Sweeting once estimated that "more than a fourth of the Bible is predictive prophecy...Both the Old and New Testaments are full of promises about the return of Jesus Christ. Over 1800 references appear in the O.T., and seventeen O.T. books give prominence to this theme. Of the 260 ...read more

  • The Hope Of Heaven Is A Powerful Strength For ...

    Contributed by Richard Tow on Dec 1, 2003
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,535 views

    The hope of heaven is a powerful strength for godly living that many people seem to virtually ignore in their daily lives. It was Myrtle Erickson who wrote: Think of stepping on a shore and finding it heaven of taking hold of a hand and finding it God’s hand of breathing new air and finding it ...read more

  • In The Movie From Louis L'amour's Book, "Hondo", ...

    Contributed by Clark Tanner on Nov 7, 2005
     | 1,166 views

    In the movie from Louis L’Amour’s book, “Hondo”, John Wayne passes the news to Geraldine Page’s character that their friend, Apache Chief Vittorio has been killed in battle. Her response is ‘no, it can’t be’, to which Hondo declares, ‘Everybody gets dead, it was his turn”. In spite of our ...read more

  • Walking Up To A Department Store's Fabric ...  PRO

    Contributed by Pat Damiani on Jun 20, 2006
    based on 7 ratings
     | 3,813 views

    Walking up to a department store’s fabric counter, an attractive young woman said, "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?" "Only one kiss per yard," replied the smirking male clerk. Not to be taken back by the harassment, the woman said, "That’s fine! I’ll take ten ...read more

  • Whenever I Hear The Word "Everlasting" I Am ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2008
     | 1,764 views

    Whenever I hear the word “everlasting” I am reminded of Everlast boxing gloves. I recall living in Moberly, Missouri where the Everlast Boxing Equipment company is located. The building where the company first began production has been abandoned for a new facility; however this presented a bit of ...read more

  • The 19th Annual Christianity Today Book Of The ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 13, 2009
     | 1,228 views

    The 19th annual Christianity Today Book of the Year Awards went to: The Jesus Legend by Paul Rhodes Eddy and Gregory A. Boyd Resounding Truth by Jeremy S. Begbie Commentary on the New Testament Use of the Old Testament by G.K. Beale and D.A. Carson Caring for Mother by Virginia Stem Owens There Is ...read more

  • Pick Out Three Hymns

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 10, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,905 views

    PICK OUT THREE HYMNS I heard about this pastor. He was raising money for a new sanctuary. He told his congregation one Sunday morning "If anybody will give $1000, you can pick out three hymns." A little old lady in the back raised up her hand and said "Pastor, I’ll do it." He was so excited. He ...read more

  • Shed The Load

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 18, 2010
     | 1,801 views

    SHED THE LOAD A missionary in the Philippines was driving in a large flat back truck. He saw a local farmer who he knew walking with a really heavy load tied to his back. The load was obviously heavy and weighing him down, so the missionary stopped and told the farmer to jump on board the truck. ...read more

  • Anger: Strength In Your Claws

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Mar 12, 2012
     | 1,937 views

    ANGER: STRENGTH IN YOUR CLAWS The biggest lobster ever caught in Maine, a 27-pounder (12.25 kg) with claws tough enough to snap a man's arm, was released back into the ocean on Thursday after being trapped in a shrimp net last week, marine officials said. The 40-inch (one-meter) male crustacean, ...read more

  • Going In Circles

    Contributed by Spencer Miller on May 19, 2013
     | 2,493 views

    GOING IN CIRCLES A family who moved into a new neighborhood had a late start one morning. As a result their six-year-old missed her school bus. Though it would make him late for work her father agreed to take her to school if she gave him directions. After 20 minutes of going in circles they ...read more

  • Soren Kierkegaard, The Great Danish Theologian Of ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,451 views

    Soren Kierkegaard, the great Danish theologian of another century, tells the story of a prince who was running an errand for his father one day in the local village. As he did so, he passed through a very poor section of the town. Looking through the window of his carriage, he saw a beautiful young ...read more

  • On Anger

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 11, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,568 views

    ON ANGER The late great writer, Bede Jarrett (1881 - 1937), once wrote: "The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn’t angry enough." The late great Indian political and spiritual leader, Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (1869 - 1948), once said, "Man should forget ...read more