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In Sermon Illustrations: "New Age Movement"

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  • Grey Hairs

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 21, 2010
     | 1,686 views

    GREY HAIRS A little girl sat on the bed pestering her mum with questions while mum was in a hurry to get changed and go out. Watching her mother looking in the mirror and plucking out the grey hairs on her head she asked, "Mummy, why do you have some grey hairs?" Her mother replied, "Because ...read more

  • You Know When You Are Growing Old When...

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 23, 2010
     | 2,042 views

    You know when you are growing old when... * Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work, * Your knees buckle and your belt won't. * Your back goes out more often than you do. * You know all the answers but no one asks the questions. * Your mind makes agreements your body can't keep. ...read more

  • The Cure

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 29, 2010
     | 2,063 views

    THE CURE Mrs Smith was so happy: "I’ve cured my husband of biting his nails." I replied, "How did you manage to do that?" "Simple," ...read more

  • The Man Who Came For The Blind

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 29, 2010
     | 3,225 views

    THE MAN WHO CAME FOR THE BLIND A fellow in our office told us recently of a household incident of which he had been an innocent but perplexed spectator. Our friend had called a Venetian-blind repairman to come pick up a faulty blind, and the next morning, while the family was seated at the ...read more

  • Where Have All The Old Men Gone?

    Contributed by Jeff Ecklund on Jan 28, 2011
     | 1,477 views

    WHERE HAVE ALL THE OLD MEN GONE? Why do we get outdated and obsolete? Why are there so few over fifty that are on the cutting edge? Cabeb, feisty old die-hard that he was, wouldn’t understand. At eighty-five he stormed the heights, ...read more

  • A Lot Better Job

    Contributed by Christian Cheong on Feb 6, 2011
     | 1,837 views

    A LOT BETTER JOB A little girl crawled up into her great grandmother's lap one day. And looking up into her great grandmother's face she saw all those lines and wrinkles. Then she felt her own smooth skin. She said to her great grandmother, "Did God make you?" Her great grandmother said, ...read more

  • When I Was Your Age...

    Contributed by Larry Wilson on Sep 2, 2011
     | 1,620 views

    WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE... A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off, an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and ...read more

  • The Here...after

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Sep 4, 2011
     | 1,391 views

    THE HERE...AFTER A vicar was talking to one of his parishioners. He said, "When you get to my age you spend a lot more time thinking about the hereafter." "Why do you say that?" enquires the parishioner. The vicar replies, "Well, I ...read more

  • Billy Graham: Growing Old Has Been A Surprise  PRO

    Contributed by Josh Hunt on Feb 7, 2012
    based on 2 ratings
     | 3,158 views

    BILLY GRAHAM: GROWING OLD HAS BEEN A SURPRISE Billy Graham, in his book "Nearing Home: Life, Faith, and Finishing Well" (pp. 1-2, Thomas Nelson), he writes: Growing old has been the greatest surprise of my life. The young live for the here and now. Thinking ahead seems to be in the form of dreams ...read more

  • Whitening Fast

    Contributed by Johnny A. Palmer Jr. on Feb 13, 2012
     | 3,408 views

    WHITENING FAST When Dr. Rees was waiting to preach, a friend commended to him, "You sure are whitening fast!" He got up and said this from the pulpit: "There is a little white flower that comes up through the earth at this season of the year - sometimes it comes up through the snow and frost; but ...read more

  • 50-Somethings For Jesus

    Contributed by Tim Smith on Feb 19, 2012
     | 1,254 views

    50-SOMETHINGS FOR JESUS At the age of 58, Tom and Elaine Samply cashed out their retirements and moved to the Czech Republic and opened a coffee shop called Common Grounds where he taught business principles to atheists. After they were there for six years, they had enough business that they ...read more

  • Aging: One Plus One  PRO

    Contributed by Josh Hunt on Feb 29, 2012
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,117 views

    AGING: ONE PLUS ONE Three old men went to the doctor for a memory test. The doctor asked the first old man, "What is one plus one?" "Two hundred seventy-four," he said. The doctor asked the same question of the second man, "What is one plus one?" "Tuesday," he said. The doctor tried the third ...read more

  • What I Wouldn't Give...

    Contributed by Scott Jensen on Mar 28, 2012
     | 2,981 views

    WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE... When Oliver Wendell Holmes was still on the U.S. Supreme Court, he and Justice Louis Brandeis took walks every afternoon. On one of these occasions Holmes, then ninety-two, paused to gaze in frank admiration at a beautiful young girl who passed them. He even turned to look ...read more

  • Curing Nail-Biting

    Contributed by Gordon Curley on Oct 20, 2012
     | 2,369 views

    CURING NAIL-BITING Talking of bad habits I did hear the story of an elderly couple. The wife proudly boasted that "she had cured her husband of biting his nails." When someone asked her, "How did you manage ...read more

  • No Green Bananas

    Contributed by Perry Greene on Jan 29, 2013
     | 1,996 views

    NO GREEN BANANAS Approaching 85 years of age, Mrs. Wells finally decided it was time to give up her home in North Carolina and move to Miami. She was given the name of a Florida realtor, who enthusiastically drove her all over Miami, extolling the virtues of every apartment they looked at. ...read more

  • Elevator Magic  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Nov 24, 2008
    based on 4 ratings
     | 3,792 views

    ELEVATOR MAGIC An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] ...read more

  • Old Age Comes From God, Old Age Leads On To ...

    Contributed by Tony Abram on Dec 27, 2008
     | 2,470 views

    Old age comes from God, old age leads on to God. (Pierre Teilhard ...read more

  • The Older The Fiddle…

    Contributed by Tony Abram on Dec 27, 2008
     | 1,180 views

    The older the fiddle, the sweeter the tune. ...read more

  • Tis Sweet To Grow Old In The Fear Of The Lord

    Contributed by Tony Abram on Dec 27, 2008
     | 1,608 views

    'Tis sweet to grow old in the fear of the Lord, As life's shadows longer creep. Till our steps grow slow, and our sun swings low-- He ...read more

  • Seven Ages Of Man

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
     | 2,461 views

    SEVEN AGES OF MAN Someone described the seven ages of man in these ways: spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills, wills. Spills - Infancy. Drills - Childhood. We get drilled about doing this and that. Thrills - Teen years perhaps. I'm not sure they are all that thrilling, however. Bills - ...read more