Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 23, 2010
WHAT WILL THEY SAY?
A minister, a priest and a rabbi die and go to heaven for orientation. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket, and friends, family, and congregants are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say?"
The minister says, "I would like to hear them say that I
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Brethren
Contributed by Larry Wilson on Sep 2, 2011
DRINKING COFFEE AND TALKING
One evening a man and his wife called another couple to see what they were doing. "Oh," said the other wife, "we're just drinking coffee and talking."
As she hung up the phone, she demanded, "Why don't we ever do that? They're just drinking coffee and talking."
Her
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Curry Pikkaart on Aug 15, 2012
based on 1 rating
| 4,861 views
COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS
A woman went to court and told the judge she wanted a divorce. "Do you have any grounds?" the judge asked.
"Just two acres," she replied.
"That's not it, lady. I mean, do you have a grudge?"
"No, we park the car in the front of the house."
Frustrated, the judge
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jan 22, 2025
"'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Larry Thompson on Jun 6, 2002
based on 13 ratings
| 27,161 views
Last week I read in the advice column in the paper about a couple who was celebrating 50 years of marriage. The husband wrote that someone commented, ¡§Ken, 50 years is a long time.¡¨ He immediately responded: ¡§Not nearly as long as it would have been without her.¡¨ I couldn¡¦t get the man¡¦s
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 30, 2001
based on 67 ratings
| 1,355 views
In October of 1996, Linda Pugach bailed her husband, Burton, 69, out of jail after his arrest for threatening to kill his mistress of five years. Linda and Burton go way back. In 1959, she was blinded in both eyes by a lye attack arranged by Burton after she spurned his marriage proposal. He was
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Contributed by Richard Burkey on May 19, 2005
based on 21 ratings
| 3,842 views
Some Things To Be Thankful For This Thanksgiving.
1. Be thankful for automatic dishwashers. They make it possible to get out of the kitchen before the family come in for their after-dinner snacks.
2. Be thankful for husbands who attack small repair jobs around the house. They usually make them big
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Rick Davis on Jun 11, 2003
based on 15 ratings
| 11,471 views
MARRIAGE JOKES
1. Marriage made in Heaven — So is thunder in lightening!!
2. Love is a dream — Marriage is an alarm clock
3. A honeymoon is a Short Pause - between - I Do and You Better
4. Lady went to get a divorce—
Lawyer: “Do you have ground?”
Lady: “About 2 acres”
Lawyer: “Do
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 2, 2004
based on 3 ratings
| 2,113 views
THE WHOLE EAST COAST
While our friends from India traveled around California on business, they left their 11 year-old daughter with us. Curious about my going to church one Sunday morning, she decided to come along. When we returned home, my husband asked her what she thought of the service.
"I
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Contributed by Mel Shepherd on Jul 2, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 4,780 views
One morning there was a terrible snowstorm and so here was this mother of three small children outside shoveling snow out of the driveway. A neighbor also shoveling snow at the same time yells out to her, “Why isn’t your husband outside helping you with this chore?” Well, she said, “Someone
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Aug 6, 2009
based on 2 ratings
| 2,651 views
"TAKE ONE OF US HOME"
I heard about the couple celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. When the festivities were over, the woman turned to her husband and said, "We’ve been miserable for 50 years. We’ve fought every day. We’ve disagreed on nearly everything, and I am convinced that we can’t
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 27, 2010
based on 2 ratings
| 2,946 views
"HAVE FAITH"
My husband, Ron, once taught a class of mentally impaired teenagers. Looking at his students’ capabilities rather than their limitations, Ron got them to play chess, restore furniture and repair electrical appliances. Most important, he taught them to ‘have faith’ that is to believe
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Denomination:
Brethren
based on 1 rating
| 2,386 views
Surprised to see an empty seat at the Super Bowl stadium, a diehard fan remarked about it to a woman sitting nearby.
"It was my husband's," the woman explained, "But he died." "I'm very sorry," said the man. Then he continued.
"Yet, I'm really
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Johnny Creasong on Aug 20, 2004
based on 5 ratings
| 2,421 views
When Life Crashes In
The classic MG moved briskly through the afternoon traffic. The drive enjoyed the quick response of the small high-powered convertible. After driving her station wagon, this little red car was rather like taking off her boots and putting on sneakers. Driving along with the
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on May 9, 2002
based on 8 ratings
| 2,868 views
SHOWING RESPECT FOR MOM
Adrian Rogers, Pastor of the Bellevue Baptist Church in Memphis, TN, tells a story about a man, his boys, and respect for their mother:
"It seems that one of the boys lipped off to his mother one day. Now I don’t know about your home, but in the Rogers home showing
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 25, 2002
based on 10 ratings
| 4,854 views
GENERATION TO GENERATION
A little girl called out, "Mommy, you know that vase china cabinet, the one that’s been handed down from generation to generation?"
Yes, dear, I know which one you mean, what about it?
"Well, Mommy, I’m sorry, but this generation just dropped it!"
Now some earthly
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 21, 2002
based on 9 ratings
| 5,038 views
JAMES DOBSON ON HALLOWEEN
Mr. Dobson’s reply to the question: "What about Halloween?"
"Halloween is a rather different story. Whereas it can be argued that Christmas is a Christian holiday with Christian origins that has suffered the effects of growing secularism, Halloween can be traced to
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