Text: 1 Kings 12:22, KJV: But the word of God came unto Shemaiah the man of God, saying, 23 Speak unto Rehoboam, the son of Solomon, king of Judah, and unto all the house of Judah and Benjamin, and to the remnant of the people, saying, 24 Thus saith the LORD, Ye shall not go up, nor fight against
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Baptist
Contributed by Ken Hubbard on Feb 3, 2010
The Guys’ Rules
We always hear "The Rules" from the female point of view...Now here are the rules from the male side.
Please note...these are all numbered “1” on purpose!
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up,
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Tony Abram on Jan 25, 2007
1.Some people have such bad nerves that they cannot sleep in church.
2. If people sleep during the sermon, the pastor needs to wake up.
3. Sometimes how well you sleep depends on how little you lie.
4. If you cannot sleep at night, don’t count sheep, talk to the
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Contributed by Charles Newman on Aug 4, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 1,947 views
Sometimes I find myself like the little boy reasoned in his prayer to God. He told God that "Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am."
We get so caught up in
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Mark Evans on Sep 12, 2003
based on 18 ratings
| 2,956 views
A preacher and an atheistic barber were once walking through the city slums. Said the barber to the preacher: "This is why I cannot believe in a God of love. If God was as kind and loving as you say, He would not permit all this poverty, disease, and squalor. He would not allow these poor bums to
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Oil lamps once played a major role in the early days of colonial America. The vast majority of homes in those days had a lamp that usually had a glass reservoir with a wick and chimney. The company that manufactured the lamp would give specific instructions concerning its care.
-From the
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 4,524 views
TATER PEOPLE
(author unknown)
Some people are very bossy and like to tell others what to do, but don’t want to soil their own hands. Too many chiefs and not enough Indians
They are called "Dick Taters" .
Some people never seem motivated to participate, but are just content to watch while others do
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Contributed by Peter Loughman on Jan 6, 2009
REAL FAITH
The classic test an atheist will give to prove there is no God is this: "If there is a God, let him kill me right now". When nothing happens, they will confidently claim, "See there is no God, for I am still alive and well." Now if we were to ask the atheist, "What if someone came up to
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by David Limiero on Jun 5, 2001
based on 84 ratings
| 2,217 views
The Mineola Messenger printed an article entitled "Children and Their Changing Attitude Towards Their Parents." Let me read it to you:
Age 4: "My parents can do anything"
Age 8: "There might be one or two things they don’t know."
Age 12: "Naturally, my parents don’t understand."
Age 14: "I
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Lynn Floyd on Jan 19, 2004
based on 11 ratings
| 2,609 views
Some nine year old children were asked what they thought of death and dying. Jim said, “When you die, they bury you in the ground and your souls goes to heaven, but your body can’t go to heaven because it’s too crowded up there already.” Judy said, “Only the good people go to heaven. The other
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 17, 2006
based on 1 rating
| 1,496 views
Robert Fulghum wrote in the Kansas City Times, "Most of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sandbox at nursery school.
"These are the things I learned:
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Contributed by Paul Wallace on Sep 19, 2006
If only insurance executive Walter Kaye had not arranged for a White House internship for a young woman named Monica Lewinsky.
If only skipper Joseph Hazelwood had been paying attention when his tanker, the Exxon Valdez, entered Prince William Sound.
If only John F. Parker, the bodyguard assigned
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Tim White on Apr 16, 2012
There is a commercial for a television service provider that states, if you don’t get good programs, you feel bad about yourself. When you feel bad about yourself you go to self-improvement seminars. When you go to self-improvement seminars, you feel like a winner. When you feel like a winner, you
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Baptist
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