• What He Heard His Wife Say,

  Contributed by Tim Harlow on May 13, 2009 (message contributor)

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  Scripture:  None

  Tags:  Men And Women

  Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "You’re way too stupid to be trusted driving alone in bad weather at your age."

WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID, "Drive carefully, dear."

WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "Honey, why don’t you put your head in a vice and I’ll turn the handle until your skull explodes."

WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID, "Honey, why don’t you turn off the basketball game and let’s just sit and talk."

WHAT SHE HEARD HER HUSBAND SAY, "It’s your lot in life to stop whatever it is you’re doing in order to serve my every need!"

WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID, "Honey, do you know if we have any more triple-A batteries?"

WHAT SHE HEARD HIM SAY, "Life as we know it will cease to exist unless you can alter the space-time continuum!"

WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID, "Honey, are you almost ready?"

WHAT HE HEARD HIS WIFE SAY, "I’m going to make you wish you were dead for the rest of the week."

WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID, "Tell me the truth, honey. Do I look fat in this?"