STUPID IDEA
As far as stupid ideas go, this was one of my better moments. I stayed after church one Tuesday night with a number of other kids in the youth group. We were just hanging out and talking for a bit. We were a pretty wild youth group to begin with, but if you know anything about young teenagers, you know that the more of them you put in the same place unsupervised, the stupider they get. Intelligence actually drops, that is a medically proven fact.
This time was no exception. We had been hanging out talking but eventually we got bored and wanted to do something. Now we had a really open church parking lot. One of the guys there had a video camera...which also seriously decreases the intelligence of the group. We proceeded to stack up a few bails of hay and started out by having someone sit in a shopping cart and we pushed them as fast as we could into the curb, which would launch them out of the cart into the pile of hay. This was great fun.
Then the cart broke...but we would not be deterred. We figured if a shopping cart was fun, a car would work even better. That little voice that tells you not to do things had gone on vacation for me. So I volunteered to get on the hood of the car and get ramped into the hay. The car went to the back of the parking lot I hopped on the hood and off we went. We got up to about 25 miles an hour before the driver slammed on the brakes and I was tossed from the car to the pile of hay. It worked out perfectly.
So we decided to do it again. This time with two of us. I got on one side and my friend Zach got on the other. Same deal, car sped up, this time to about 30 miles and hour and then slammed on the brakes. One problem: this time he slammed on the brakes a little earlier. I left the car first. I was thrown and rather than hitting the hay flat as I had the first time, I hit it head first. Zach, who stayed on the car a split second longer than I did, flew to the pile of hay and landed with his entire body on my head. The stray from the hay pierced the skin all over one side of my face, even going though the skin of my lip into my mouth. I went to school the next day as two-face...but it wasn’t Halloween.