When I was a freshman at Lincoln Christian College, I had an experience that made me seriously question my calling into the ministry. My professor for a class on the Life of Christ had approached me about leading the group in a Scripture reading and prayer to begin our class time. I agreed. But the next morning when I stood in front of 75-80 of my peers and opened the Bible to read, I was overcome with nervousness. I stuttered, I stammered, I cleared my throat 10 or 15 times. I cut my Scripture reading short from what I had planned, and said a short prayer. Then slunk back to my seat.
I remember being bothered by the incident for several days. How could I expect to become a preacher if I couldn’t even read the Bible to my class? One night that week, I went to the chapel to pray about this. And at the chapel building I crossed paths with Mark Miller – a graduate student that my parents’ church had just hired to be their minister. He asked me how things were going as a freshman ministry student. He seemed like he really wanted to know. So I told him my struggle. “I don’t know if I’m cut out for this.” And I explained to him what had happened earlier in the week. He listened patiently, then told me the same thing happened to him his freshmen year. I don’t remember anything else he said, but I do remember that I experienced God speaking through Him. I felt God touch my heart, renew my strength, and reassure me He would always be with me. I don’t believe it was a coincidence that I happened to see Mark in the chapel that night. God wanted to use him give me the touch of Christ.