Sleeping in Church
A Minister, while preaching, noted most of his congregation was asleep. He stopped the sermon and asked a deacon to pass the offering plate. The deacon woke up red-faced and reminded him the offering had already been taken.
His response; “Never mind, take up another one. I intend to make them pay for lodging as well as spiritual food.”
By the time the second offering was taken up the congregation was wide awake.