Chemistry 101 -- Table of Elements
Two new additions to the Periodic Table of Elements:
Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight:(don’t even go there)
Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may
freeze at anytime. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled.
Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong
affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to shinier specimen.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
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Element Name: MAN
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180 +/-50)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of
shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust & aging, samples are unable to
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